<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>I Know This Light by blueskies_88</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29018403">I Know This Light</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueskies_88/pseuds/blueskies_88'>blueskies_88</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Merlin (BBC)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blood and Injury, Canon Divergence - Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, Canonical Character Death, Depression, Endgame Merthur, Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, Eventual Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts, Grief/Mourning, Immortality, King Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin (TV) Season/Series 05, Merlin's Magic Revealed (Merlin), Not Beta Read, Not Epilogue Compliant, Not Really Character Death, Post-Canon Fix-It, Post-Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, SO, Some headcanon, Soulmates, Spoiler: doesnt stay dead, Sword Wound, i guess, kind of, mostly canon, thats kind of the point, until the end, which is vague anyways</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:34:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,213</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29018403</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueskies_88/pseuds/blueskies_88</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>I was wondering for a long time what would happen if Arthur recognized that orb of light from 1.4 The Poisoned Chalice or if he wondered why it saved him in the first place. I thought it was a cool plot device, but it was never used again in the show. So this is my attempt at using it to fix that pesky ending because it hurts my heart alot. I usually ignore a lot of it and have my headcanons, but for this, I tried to stay true to canon (even kept in the original dialogue as much as possible) and think how Arthur really would have felt and thought and how Merlin would have reacted. Besides the orb of light, there's not much difference until the ending. I even kept Gwen and her relationship with Arthur and as a Queen because I think she’s an important part of the story, even if I’m a major Merthur fan. You can read this whole story as platonic or romantic. I just think you cannot deny that Merlin and Arthur love each other very much and deserved to say it to each other at least once.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin &amp; Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merthur</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>57</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>I Know This Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>As always, let me know if I missed a trigger warning or if I should change the rating. No judgements. Stay safe.<br/>Also Spoiler Warnings for Merlin, especially Series 5 The Diamond of the Day Part I &amp; II.<br/>Also referenced is:<br/>1.4 The Poisoned Chalice<br/>1.10 The Moment of Truth<br/>1.11 The Labyrinth of Gedref<br/>1.13 Le Morte d'Arthur<br/>4.1, 4.2 The Darkest Hour: Part I &amp; II</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>I Know This Light</span>
</p><p>
  <span>As the night begins to darken, Arthur can barely keep his eyes open, despite the constant pain in his chest, traveling ever so slowly deeper towards his heart. He can feel it tear through his flesh on its journey, but the utter exhaustion in his bones and body from trying to stay alive, riding all day, and previously fighting at Camlann is starting to overpower him. The urge to sleep, to give into the pain is becoming more appealing than staying conscious, despite knowing he is less likely to wake up with such an injury.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Even so, Arthur notes the fading light. A soft blue tinge to its glow. For a moment, he wonders if the bliss of the afterlife that had already arrived and taken him from this world. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Were that so, </span>
  </em>
  <span>he thinks bitterly,</span>
  <em>
    <span> I imagine it would be less uncomfortable, </span>
  </em>
  <span>as another jolt of pain lanced through him, the piece of holy metal advancing towards his heart reminding him how he is still very much mortal.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Unless this is my due punishment, </span>
  </em>
  <span>the vague accusation prods his thoughts further down until the pain and exhaustion begins to overwhelm him again.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Again, that soft light awakes him from his cynical musings and body’s suffering. It is not the purity of moonlight which has fallen on him countless nights under the protection of storied heroes and monsters made of stars. It is not the warmth of firelight which has cooked their food and saved them from countless cold days and nights where it seems even their bones shiver. It is bright, yes this light, but cool. Like a loved one’s caress on a fevered forehead. Reassurance. Patience. Devotion. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I know this light.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur struggles to open his eyes, having almost succumbed to the temptation of sweet, deadly sleep. It takes far more energy than it should and were it not for the apathy clawing at him he would be worried. He manages, though, for that light beckoning him awake, pulling him away from thoughts of the afterlife.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I know this light.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>There, softly glowing nearby in the dark forest, was the same orb that had saved him so many years ago. So smooth and calm, almost transparent but for the light that swirled within like some spirit that had gotten trapped from one of those tales nursemaids told to frighten children. It was smaller than before, but it was definitely the same one. He had dreamed of that light for so many nights afterward, reaching for it amidst the darkness of his nightmares. He still wondered about its origin, if it was some merciful deity who thought to save him in his quest to save his manservant and friend. If it counted as magic, if it was some trick of his mind. If he could ever thank whoever sent it for guiding him out of those monstrous spider infested caverns. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He had nearly forgotten it in the years past, until now as it again pulled him from fatal sleep, and despite his pain, some tension ebbed from Arthur’s body. He could keep going. He was going to keep fighting to find some way out of this mess. For his kingdom, for his people, for Gwen and Leon and his knights. For Merlin. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Merlin.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Even for Merlin. For despite his lies, Merlin has been his closest friend. The pain of his closest friend not telling him he was a sorcerer, for not confiding in him after so many years and adventures and loyalty. It is not nearly enough to overcome the pain of leaving him alone now. For Merlin, his friend, he will fight to live.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Determined, Arthur attempts to focus on the orb, to gather strength from it as he once received guidance. This close he can see strands of blue and gold rolling within the white inside. It soothes something within Arthur, numbing the sharper edges of pain, granting him clearer thought. He finally looks away from the orb and stops short. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Merlin.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>There, cradling the orb within pale hands, is Merlin. His Merlin. Tears stream down his face, endless rivers of anguish flowing into his neckerchief. His whole body, kneeling on the forest floor, shakes, wracked with his sobbing, but his hands remain steady. Cradling that precious orb. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I know this light.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur knows. He knows who it was that saved him so many years ago. Who is still trying to save him now. “Please,” Arthur hears him plead, his whispered chanting finally reaching Arthur’s ears. “Please, I can’t lose you. Don’t leave me, don’t leave me, Arthur. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Arthur.</span>
  </em>
  <span> Please, take me instead or let me go with you. Please, please, </span>
  <em>
    <span>please</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” Merlin’s voice chokes on the final word, and Arthur’s heart breaks again.</span>
</p><p><em><span>Merlin.</span></em> <em><span>Please, no, Merlin.</span></em></p><p>
  <span>How many times had Arthur and Merlin protected each other, had offered to go in their place at the risk of their own lives, had done so with only concern for the other. The first time he encountered this orb in that cave while trying to save the man who drank poison for him. Then when Arthur drank what they thought was poison, instead of Merlin, after Arthur killed the unicorn and cursed his kingdom. When Merlin pushed him down and faced the Dorocha instead of Arthur and almost died and then when they tried to walk through the veil for each other, only for Lancelot to prove himself the most noble of his knights. Even when Arthur pushed Merlin aside from the Questing Beast’s way and was bitten in turn, it must have been Merlin who found a way to heal him. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I think there's someone watching over me, keeping me from harm,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Arthur had told his father after waking from the bite. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Are you ever going to change, Merlin,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Arthur told him that night, and Merlin had replied, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>No. I'm happy to be your servant. Till the day I die.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Til the day I die. That will not be today. Not for me or him.</span>
  </em>
  
</p><p>
  <span>--------[end scene]--------</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s the last night. Arthur knows this. Merlin should know, yet he is adamant about reaching this supposed healing lake before dawn. All day Arthur has watched Merlin, and it is only now knowing he has magic, possibly is magic according to Gaius, that Arthur thinks he truly sees Merlin. How scared and brave he is. How much he is still </span>
  <em>
    <span>Merlin</span>
  </em>
  <span>, who would rather make jokes and cast a charming grin to get out of trouble rather than spells with ancient words and meaning. Who can be so insightful and so dense. Honestly, Arthur would wonder how Merlin has survived this long if he hadn’t spent the day observing just how capable Merlin really is. How much Merlin has had to hide, beyond his magic. His intelligence and deception. How much he is willing to go for those he loves. Not unlike Arthur, himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A soft scoff escapes Arthur at the thought of comparing Merlin to himself. Merlin looks up from tending the fire. Fire he conjured again using magic. Arthur did not even have to goad him into doing it. It seemed as natural as breathing to Merlin. Arthur wonders if this is how he should live without the confines of Camelot. Would Merlin use magic everyday as Arthur uses his sword or his quill? After today’s events, Arthur thinks that for Merlin its closer to how Arthur uses all his senses. Sight, smell, taste, touch, hearing. Merlin uses his magic for it all and more. Even now, Merlin uselessly prods at the flames with idle magic as a faint golden sheen takes over the blue of his eyes, and he searches the forest, alert for any sign of danger.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur shakes his head slightly at Merlin’s inquiring look. From his place on the log, Arthur contemplates Merlin’s face, illuminated by the fire. The worried concern in his pursed lips and furrowed brow in the warm light contrasts with the image of him weeping into the brilliant orb just the night before. Two parts of Merlin, and Arthur is only just now seeing the overlay. His closest friend. A sorcerer. No, this is </span>
  <em>
    <span>Merlin</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
  <em>
    <span>“I'm still the same person,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Merlin had said before. The same Merlin. Who had apparently saved him twice from dying from that poisoned chalice. Who never said a word, never sought any credit. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>It's not why I do it,</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Merlin had said. Maybe if this was years ago when he was a brash, arrogant </span>
  <em>
    <span>young </span>
  </em>
  <span>Prince, he would consider conceding the sorcerer some honor in sacrificing themselves for the better good, for Arthur. Maybe even now, if it were anyone else, he would look away as he did when that young angry man in Ealdor took an arrow meant for Arthur and died after saving his village. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ealdor…</span>
  </em>
</p><p><em><span>Oh, Merlin,…</span></em> <em><span>you tried to tell me then, didn’t you? And he knew, didn’t he? Your friend? He saved me and you, but you still did not feel like you could confide in me. Perhaps I should have voiced how much I cared, but I thought my actions were enough. I might not have trusted magic nor those who practiced it, but I thought you knew I cared enough to allow you a moment with him as he died. </span></em></p><p>
  <span>But now, and perhaps even then Arthur knew, he would not allow Merlin to sacrifice himself. Not if Arthur has any say in this. Just as Merlin would never willingly allow Arthur to sacrifice himself. Not just because he was a King, but he was his friend. Merlin’s words echo in Arthur’s head, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I also do this because you're my friend and I don't want to lose you.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Arthur is more than just a King to Merlin, just as Merlin has always been more than a manservant. They have been friends, confidants despite Merlin’s secrets, each other’s closest person. Almost like the identical sides of a coin. Always complete when together. You cannot have one without the other. Even Guinevere knows that, and she is so much wiser than the two of them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur’s heart aches again at the thought of his wife, alone and now bearing the sole weight of the crown, but he knows her strength knows no bounds. She knows he loves this kingdom. If he is to die, she will go on. For him. For this kingdom he loves so much. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Which is why Arthur must try to continue as well. Why he has gone along with Merlin’s ridiculous plan of riding for this wretched lake, instead of waiting for his death peacefully without saddle sores. For his kingdom which has placed their trust in him. For her, his Guinevere who has loved him. For Merlin, who believes in Arthur with a ferocity seen no where else. Merlin, who was proud to be his servant and continued to do his job, even when he could have left. Merlin, who would rather suffer silently for years than make Arthur choose between his other half and his father and face the internal conflict of his bloody past with magic. Merlin, who didn’t want to put Arthur in that position. Merlin, who would never want to cause Arthur pain, physical or emotional. Because Arthur would do it. For those he loves, for Merlin, he would face it all. He would confront his position on magic. He would believe in Merlin, even if the pain in his body tells him to give up. He will believe in Merlin for a little while longer. Merlin approaches with a water skin, and Arthur drinks a bit before he decides it is time to say something to Merlin. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Just in case...</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin closes the waterskin, constantly searching the forest. Still intending to find whatever danger might threaten them so close to their goal. Arthur gathers himself one last time and starts, “Merlin</span>
  <em>
    <span>.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin immediately focuses on Arthur, eyes staring intensely into Arthur’s. Arthur looks away before continuing, “whatever happens…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Shh,” Merlin shakes his head slightly, “don’t talk.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur can’t help the eye roll. Of course, he would be so contrary and just </span>
  <em>
    <span>Merlin</span>
  </em>
  <span> now. “I'm the King, Merlin,” Arthur reminds him, “You can't tell me what to do.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A faint smirk appeared on Merlin’s pale face, “I always have. I'm not going to change now.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur looks Merlin in his eyes. “I don't want you to change,” Arthur’s voice breaking on the last word as he remembers their previous discussion after the Questing Beast incident. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Are you ever going to change, Merlin?</span>
  </em>
  <span>” “</span>
  <em>
    <span>No. I'm happy to be your servant. Till the day I die.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>If that day is today for me, he has to know. Before it's too late.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin’s face grows serious in response, but Arthur continues despite the difficulty of saying out loud what he had always felt. “I want you...to </span>
  <em>
    <span>always</span>
  </em>
  <span>...be you.” Arthur hangs his head slightly in shame, “I'm sorry about how I treated you.” The conversation has drained Arthur’s energy, and his head lowers even further. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin notices and tries to bring Arthur back to him. “Hey,” he whispers, patting Arthurs armored chest. Merlin lowers himself and leads Arthur's eyes back up, so Arthur can look at him properly. “Does- Does that mean you're gonna give me a day off?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The shock of realizing how little strength he has left has Arthur reeling, his eyes wide open, staring into the distance. A gasped “Two,” leaves him and he tries to find Merlin’s eyes.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur’s unexpected answer to their old joke settles Merlin with the thought that maybe Arthur has accepted him. Maybe things wont change and Arthur and Merlin are still ok. “That’s generous,” Merlin’s hushed voice fondly responds.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>You are bloody right it is,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Arthur can’t help but internally laugh,</span>
  <em>
    <span> After all you’ve put me through.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur tries to look at Merlin and still play along with their banter, hoping to reassure Merlin that they are ok. But sleep calls and Arthur is exhausted. His head lowers again, and this time Merlin places his hand on the side of Arthur’s face. His cold fingers find a weak pulse where Arthur’s blood struggles to keep him alive as the metal kills him. Still, Arthur was here and alive, and he felt comfortable enough to joke with Merlin. Merlin let the mask slip from his face and his worry shine through as he held Arthur. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Get some sleep,” he said, and with this permission, Arthur finally allows himself to sleep, knowing Merlin knows what Arthur meant.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>--------[end scene]--------</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin does not let up. Not after Arthur needs to rest yet again after continuing their trek. Not after Morgana arrives out of nowhere to blast Merlin away and cruelly mock Arthur on his impending death. Not after Merlin stabs Morgana with Excalibur, which was apparently “</span>
  <em>
    <span>forged in a dragon’s breath</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” Not after Merlin single handedly eradicates this land’s largest threat and Arthur can only stare at him in wonder and disbelief that they’ve finally “</span>
  <em>
    <span>brought peace at last</span>
  </em>
  <span>”. Not after Merlin’s only thought is “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Arthur</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No, Merlin is determined. “Come on,” he says, “We have to make it to the lake.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur cannot continue. Their kingdom is safe. Merlin helped them defeat the Saxons; he killed Morgana. He ensured peace at last. Arthur can rest now. He allows what little control he has over his body to slip, and he falls to the ground, Merlin faithfully following him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Merlin...not without the horses. We can't, it's too late. It's too late.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin desperately looks around, trying to get Arthur to a more upright position, searching for some faster way to get to the lake.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Even you have your limits, Merlin, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Arthur thought wistfully, </span>
  <em>
    <span>and so do I. </span>
  </em>
  <span>He tries to sooth Merlin, patting his hand as he continues fidgeting for some way out of this mess.“All your magic, Merlin, you-”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>No,” Merlin groans, protesting their current reality. He shakes his head and he holds Arthur tighter, as if someone was going to take him away now.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“-can't save my life,” Arthur finished. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can,” Merlin argues, still panting from trying to to lift Arthur again, “I'm not going to lose you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur recalls Merlin’s words into that lovely white orb, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I can’t lose you. Don’t leave me, Arthur.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” The haunting image of Merlin’s tearstained face pleading to the orb’s light pains Arthur more than the jostling of his wounds. “Just, just-” Arthur starts, hoping to further sooth Merlin but not knowing what to say to calm him.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Of course, he would be difficult in my last moments.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just hold me,” Arthur ends, knowing Merlin would be distracted by such a command. Immediately, Merlin gathers him closer, as if by some instinct to survive.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>And I need it too.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Please,” Arthur softly asks, and it sounds just like Merlin’s pleas that night that Merlin stops in shock. Arthur pats Merlin’s hand more firmly, trying to reassure him, but Arthur has more to say.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin lost in memories of that night and in the knowledge Arthur had heard him almost misses Arthur’s next words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s...There's something I want to say.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Merlin’s head is spinning; he has to stop Arthur.  “You're not going to say goodbye,” he commands Arthur, fear tinging the words.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No,” Arthur rasps immediately, reassuring him. Arthur commands his attention, “Merlin,” for his next words. Visions of their past adventures fly in Arthur’s mind. Merlin stands by him in every one. “Everything you've done.” Arthur recalls the cool touch of the orb’s light. “I know now.” Arthur understands now exactly why Merlin chose to not confide his magic in Arthur. “For me, for Camelot.”  Arthur grows more serious considering the enormity of what Merlin has done. “For the kingdom you helped me build.” All of it done with Merlin at his side. Merlin’s heart breaks as he retorts, “You'd have done it without me.” Arthur huffs a laugh. “Maybe,” he fondly concedes, still doubtful.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I have to finish this. I have to let him know. He has to know.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur looks off again as he searches for the words he needs. Merlin continues to hold him, but he looks more confused and still concerned. “I want to say,” Arthur struggles to turn his body enough, just enough, “something I've never said to you before.” Arthur finally meets Merlin’s eyes. “Thank you,” the solemn words fall from Arthur’s lips, and Merlin stills. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It's not enough. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur reaches his hand out to touch the back of Merlin’s head. A pale mimicry of how Merlin held that orb, but it’s all Arthur can manage now. He stares into Merlin’s eyes and can swear he can still see tints of gold in between the tears, but he finishes, “I love you, my other half.”</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I hope it’s enough.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur’s eyes begin to close, as Merlin calls his name, “Arthur, hey, Arthur.” Arthur remains silent, and something inside Merlin breaks further. As still as he is, everything inside Merlin starts to swirl. His magic is a torment inside, but he stays still, holding Arthur. Arthur, whose hand falls away from Merlin. “No, Arthur!” Merlin cries out, clutching at him as he feels the body in his arms loosen, as if something was set free. He feels for that faint pulse of life beneath his hand. There is nothing but cold skin. Merlin panics and shouts Arthur’s name loud enough he swears Arthur’s eyes jolt open. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Stay with me,” Merlin whispers, pleading again to his world, his other half, to stay. Merlin cradles his head, so gently, even as tears blur his eyes and violent shakes overwhelm him. Yet Arthur’s eyes roll backward and his eyelids falter as Merlin’s tears threaten to fall unto that pale, silent face. “Arthur. Arthur. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Arthur</span>
  </em>
  <span>,” he chants the name like prayer, touching his forehead to Arthur’s, “No....” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The Merlin wails, so full of grief and anguish that even the ground trembled and its wave shook out shadows throughout the land. Flowers lost their colors, and fruits their sweet taste. Plants wilted and trees withered. Brooks no longer babbled, and rivers crept exhaustedly along. Birds no longer chirped, rabbits and deer hid their young, and even butterflies seemed to be gone. The people grew cold and tired, suddenly overcome with grief that was not their own. A Queen and her Knights bowed their heads and sobbed. A royal court physician stared at two bowls of warm food. Somewhere two dragons roared in joint mourning, and only one survived.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>A white light streaked with gold and blue shone from Merlin’s hands. “Arthur,” Merlin whispered again, his eyes closed shut against this truth, “please.” The world held its breath. Even the silence seemed to be waiting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The light gently combed over Arthur’s body, until it found the source of this suffering. Delicately, it pushed the hated metal from Arthur’s heart, carefully piecing together muscle and encouraging blood vessels to bind back. The process was long and slow, and Merlin remained still, holding Arthur, his other half the entire time. The light finally removed the metal from Arthur’s body, leaving only a faint white scar. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin slowly opened his eyes and golden light shone, but still, Arthur did not move. Merlin shifted and, golden eyes still blazing, carried Arthur in his arms as he stood and walked towards the lake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It took some time, but it seemed even the rocks and weeds moved out of his way. At last, Merlin reached the lake's shore. The water hesitated to touch him, but Merlin only stared until it began to lap at his ankles. Merlin held Arthur close as he walked up to his waist in the lake. Merlin looked at his King, his other half once more, then let him go. Arthur’s body floated away, the gentlest of waves rolling him away from Merlin, under the water’s surface, towards the isle in the middle of the lake.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And Merlin waited, staring into the depths of Lake Avalon and its isle. It was not a short wait. Dawn’s bright light came and went. Dusk followed. Merlin remained. The lake’s cold water had leached the warmth from his body and settled around him by the time Merlin felt a ripple. He didn’t dare turn away. Faint murmurs echoed and life began to stir slowly, yet Merlin did not move. Still as stone, waiting for his King, his other half. Moonlight shone, bright and full, and Merlin stayed.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Another day’s light was blooming when something glistened underneath the water’s surface. A white light, streaked with gold and red. There before Merlin, a golden head rose from the water. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Arthur was whole and hale. His armor glowing and skin unblemished save the permanent white scar from the sword’s mortal blow. A fond smile graced his face, as golden eyes met his blue. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Merlin.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Merlin dared not blink. Then stone broke.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Arthur!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They rushed towards each other and water swirled as they embraced. The world stopped holding its breath and colorful joy returned.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They both cried tears of joy and they held each other. All was well.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>--------[end scene]--------</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was many years before Death came for Arthur again. The Once and Future King and The Greatest Sorcerer to Ever Live brought the golden age, full of magic and love. Peace prospered and kindness was abundant. Death came for Arthur Pendragon, in his bed, surrounded by his loved ones. The years had aged his face and streaked his hair, but happiness and contentment had creased his eyes and mouth. Death came for Arthur, with Gwen’s hand in his and Merlin, his other half, chattering away to Arthur’s children about their many adventures. Death came for Arthur, and Merlin turned towards Death with golden eyes in his aged face. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>He will not be staying with you for long. I expect you to treat him well.”</span>
  </em>
  <span> With that Death shivered and guided Arthur away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Queen Guinevere and her blue-eyed descendants ruled for many years. Merlin watched over them, even as he mourned his lost other half. Merlin stayed until all of Arthur’s descendants had scattered the globe, and Arthur’s legacy lasted through only stories and legends. Then he, too, traveled the world. Time passed. People came and went. Merlin ached of loneliness, but he knew it was temporary. Arthur would come back. Content in this knowledge, Merlin explored and learned, even as he waited. He had so much to show Arthur when he came back. Magic faded, dissolving into the vastness of the world and its people. Merlin still practiced, still spoke with Aithusa, still felt the pull of the Earth and stars and sea. He was still Magic, after all. Just without purpose right now. So he tried new things and made new friends and planned exactly how to explain it all to Arthur when he arrived. He waited. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a long time. But Merlin was patient, and he believed in Arthur. Finally, Merlin felt a bursting shift in nature's energy. Small but powerful. Merlin went back to Lake Avalon. He stood in its cold, timeless waters. He waited. Arthur was beaming, youthful and full of life. Merlin grinned as the years on his own body faded. A soft white light bloomed, streaked with gold and interwoven with blue and red. Both halves of the coin embraced and finally were whole.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>“I came back, because you're the only friend I have and I couldn't bear to lose you.” Arthur to Merlin in The Sword in the Stone: Part II 1.13<br/>I imagine Arthur feeling like this after coming back alive each time, but I thought it a tad too cheesy to work it in. I hope the sentiment is still there though.<br/>Well, that’s it. Hope you enjoyed it. Let me know here or on <a href="https://blue-skies88.tumblr.com/">blue-skies88 tumblr</a> if I missed any Merlin lore or anything grammar/spelling you find. I will be coming back to edit this more later, but I'm making myself post now to stop from messing with it at 3 am lol<br/>Thanks for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>